A Loser's Night at the Prom
Posted: 3:30 PM (Manila Time) | February 20, 2003
By Prankoys JuJuCoder
WARNING: LOSER DETECTED
Gummy Village Idiot
(Pardon me if I sound bitter here, but its just my Loser Syndrome acting up again. Long and scorn-filled article here, beware. If I feel any better in the future, maybe I'll write something more positive. For now, live with this.)
Well. Last night was this year's annual Juniors-Seniors Promenade Ball. 'Twas a night of joy for some, and a night of mixed happiness and misery for some, including myself. Why some of us were struck by misery, I will explain near the end of this piece. For now, let us have an outline of the the event, for those of you bastards who haven't been to a prom before.
Let's see now... where to start? Ah... The JS Prom is an occasion where the Juniors and Seniors get together in some ballroom and have these silly "passing of responsibilities" and awarding ceremonies. Now you'll have some retards telling you that the prom is all about the symbolism of blah-blah-yadda-yadda, but in truth, the prom really centers on one thing, but that doesn't come until later in the prom, so just be patient and ride this damn thing through.
This particular prom started off with a Doxology, sort of like a prayer made into a song, which was performed by the Junior and Senior (hereafter referred to as "Jeers" and "Squints," don't ask me why I picked those words) members of the DPS Choir. I paid special attention to this part, since she was there. I looked like an unholy, irreverent scumbag when I flitted around taking pictures of the choir, but I don't care. I don't care what people think of me these days. Not since the, how shall I say, Fifth Impact.
Then came the opening remarks, made by the school's assistant principal. Out of courtesy, I took a picture from my vantage point near the computer equipped with a projector, but turned a deaf ear to most of what she said. Listening to speeches made by people whom I don't care about was never my strong point. I did put on my fake attentive face, though.
After that, the president of the corporation the school is part of (Open your eyes, people. It's a corporation. No surprise why we shell out bazillions of pesos and all we get in return is... nothing. We even have to pay for stuff that the school should foot the bill for.) delivered an "inspirational message." I heard nothing inspirational in what little of the speech I listened to. I caught her trying to hit some righteously non-attentive people with her words. So much for inspiration.
The Cotillion De Honor started right after the "inspirational message" (heavy sarcasm). Pictures were taken, people watched the dancers, and I nearly tripped over someone's dress. Nothing special, move along.
Once the cotillion was finished, the school paper's EIC (AGGRESSION INHIBITORS ACTIVATED) came onstage and spoke some prophetic gibberish. The prophecies were about pretty obvious stuff, and only served to boost the egos of those were called out. I was one of those mentioned, and I didn't give a crap. I was really getting hungry at this point.
The prophecy was complete, and so the EIC left the stage. The presidents and vice-presidents of the Jeers and Squints came up and made those dumb "key and torch passing" ceremonies. Many people stopped paying attention at this point, as the waiters started bringing in the food in the middle of the ceremony. Heh.
Dinner was served, and so the candles on the tables were lit, and the lights were dimmed. It was marginally difficult to eat in the dark, as you never knew whether you were sticking your fork into a piece of meat or the hand of the guy next to you. The food was nice, but it could've used more variety. The first plate served had 10 pieces of near-tasteless ebi tempura, just enough for the occupants of one table. Some of tables had less people seated at them, so some of them were lucky and had two pieces. The second plate was filled with some unrecognizable entrails that tasted like ham. The third and fourth plates served both had mushrooms mixed with meat, and I nearly killed myself when the rice came. Yep, you guessed it, more mushrooms. One of my classmates theorized that the ballroom hadn't been used in a while, and mushrooms started growing in it, so they just cleaned the room up and cooked the fungus to save resources. The last two plates had corn as their main ingredient. I wasn't able to try the first one, but it looked like it had chicken mixed with corn, and the second one was fish fillet with corn smeared all over it. There was some soup as well, made up completely of egg (and some bits of meat). I didn't try the dessert, as I never liked lychees. Besides, at that point my bladder was screaming bloody murder, so I had to go the restroom and relieve myself. (NO, NOT IN THAT way, you pervert!)
The awarding ceremonies were held right after the dinner. (or was that before dinner? I don't know. The events of last night are pretty muddled in my mind) The recipients of the awards were no surprise, as they were the most obvious choices for them. The prom king and queen were also revealed, and they lead the dance.
Yes, THE DANCE.
Indeed, the time which everyone with a significant other gleefully awaited, and those less fortunate dreaded, myself included. People flocked to the dance floor and started dancing, much to the chagrin of those who had no one to dance with. It didn't help my mood that I got my heart broken a mere three days before. Just to illustrate my point:
| PRANKOYS STATUS REPORT |
| monkey | BEFORE DANCE STARTED | DURING PROM KING/QUEEN DANCE | WHILE WATCHING DANCE |
| Morale | 65% - "This isn't too bad..." | 25% - "*sigh*" | -70% - "Keep those forks away from me..." |
Due to the fact that I felt like a piece of shit stepped on by a herd of elephants, I was only able to dance with two women. Yeah, and since it was my first time dancing, I kept stepping on their toes. I danced with her first, but I couldn't even look her in the eye as we danced. I guess I should be thankful that she even danced with me at all. I am so pathetic. For the rest of the night, I took pictures, drank water, and made regular visits to the restroom because of all the water I drank. It was really depressing watching all those couples dancing so close to each other, so it was a relief when the music stopped and the prom ended. I met up with my parents outside the hotel, and slept on the way home. Depression drains energy, you see.
I can't think of a way to end this article, so if you'll excuse me, I'll just go and continue gathering supplies for my hermitage, which I still have to find a site for. Anyone wanna help me out here? Any isolated mountain or island will do. Hell, even a plot of land in Siberia will do, as long as I can raid nearby towns for supplies.
Note #1: If Prankoys sounds like a whiny bastard, get used to it. He's always like that when he's down.
Note #2: Prankoys was able to take pictures of someone who was really desperate for someone to dance with. The picture is still awaiting approval for posting.
Note #3: If you do not know what Fifth Impact means, then good. It's better if you didn't know. It's better if no one knew.
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